After the breakthrough I experienced and the decision I made to end it with the Terminator, I waited a couple of weeks before telling him, to see if I experienced that desire for him that was so familiar. I wanted to be sure. And really, I was (and am) happy, content and satisfied with Mr. Jones and don’t want anyone else.
Although class and good manners dictate that I should have broken it off in person, I didn’t want to. I was done and I didn’t want to prolong it. So I wrote:
I should be saying this to you in person or on the phone at least, and I’m sorry about that. I wanted to spare us both.What happened between us physically and emotionally was beyond extraordinary (in my experience) and because of that I will never, ever forget you. You brought my body and soul back to life, literally, after a long period of darkness.I wish you all the love and happiness in the world, and I hope that you achieve all your dreams and find the love that you deserve.
The next day he responded:
Just received your message; funny i was just thinking to myself, “wow she hasn’t texted or called me” I kind of figured this was coming. I thought i would get the send off with me making u squirt all over my sheets lol. I’ll miss all the wild things we never got to do; one thing most of all ;-). I loved pleasuring every inch of your body and will think about it often. I hope all goes well in your relationship, I’m always happy to see someone find love.
I love u and will miss u always.
It’s been over a month, and I am sure I made the right decision. J and I are closer and more passionate than ever (we couldn’t wait but of course, we play protected); and when I think of Terminator, and I do — it’s not with yearning or desire, but with sweet nostalgia. He was a beautiful way to get to learn what I needed to learn.
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